Tag Archives: satire

Frequently Asked Questions about T.M.I.

Posted on January 13, 2015 by PMcG

Q. What is T.M.I.? A. Can you be more specific? Q. T as in tee, M as in eminem, I as in eye. A. You mock me. Q. No. It’s just that people keep saying “Dude, that’s TMI.” What does … Continue reading →

Posted in F.A.Q., News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , | 6 Comments

The last surviving sausage

Posted on January 6, 2015 by PMcG

How many hours, how many days do you think you’ve spent staring blankly into the refrigerator, not sure exactly what you’re looking for but too starved, too lost at sea, too off your meds to know it aint in there? … Continue reading →

Posted in News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy | Tagged , , , , | 6 Comments

A flat iron will do the trick

Posted on December 31, 2014 by PMcG

I have very few complaints. Nothing that a million dollars couldn’t resolve. The only real annoyance I can think of—and it’s such a piddling, nitpicky issue that I’m embarrassed to admit it—but I haven’t yet received my million dollars. And … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , | 6 Comments

When she is ten times better at it

Posted on December 18, 2014 by PMcG

You’ve seen it happen again and again. Someone throws a fish to a seal, he goes “Ork ork,” catches it in his mouth, swallows it and comes back for another. Yet if somebody throws a fish to a man, it … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Apostles playing shuffleboard

Posted on December 9, 2014 by PMcG

Persuaded by several factors, I decided to sell my Nobel Prize (NOZE). Factor One: I’d gotten all the glory I was ever going to get from it. My wife was proud, but she wasn’t going to get up every day … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Irish in the powder room

Posted on December 2, 2014 by PMcG

At a party last week, I ducked into the powder room because I do unannounced freelance inspections on behalf of one of the bigger gunpowder companies. Fortunately, it was unoccupied at the time. It’s sooooo much easier that way. I … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

The head of a toad

Posted on November 26, 2014 by PMcG

I’m going to be blunt: no sugar-coating, no waffling, no pancaking, no sausaging, no baconing, no bear clawing. And political correctness be damned. Oh, and no napkinating. So. The truth is (and this hurts) we own a stupid toaster. I’m … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , | 7 Comments