Tag Archives: absurd

Free wisdom

A few years ago I stepped down as the chief executive officer of a well known Fortune 500 company. Unfortunately, I’m forbidden by a court order to name it—a long story for another time. For now I’ll just call it … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision | Tagged , , , , | 4 Comments

That is, to say, screwed

Q. Just who do you think you are?A. I am a United States citizen who knows his rights. Q. Whose rights?A. Well, his rights. Look, I was speaking in the third person, even though there are just the two of … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , | 4 Comments

Tremendous Suck

I have a whine with the way scientists have failed to explain the journalistic  6 W’s and the H (Who, What, Where, When, Why and Wowser Howzer) of black holes. I’ve streamed endless black hole specials, I’ve seen black hole … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, funny, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

The written test-19

This coronavirus written test is for those too squeamish to have a goal post stuck up their noses and twirled like a swizzle stick. (That’s right, some people have more than one nose. Your point?) In 500 words or less, … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , , | 8 Comments

The Peanut Vendor’s Widow

Q. Excuse me. I lost my cell phone. Have you seen it? A. Do I know you? Q. If you knew me, you’d know you don’t know me. A. Then how would I have seen your cell phone? Q. That’s … Continue reading

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Gorilla suit protocol (applies also to grizzlies)

Q. I’m thinking of robbing a bank. Should I wear a mask? A. You mean so nobody will describe you to a police artist for the wanted poster? Q. I’ve got a gorilla mask leftover from Halloween. I wear that … Continue reading

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Eye-squinting

Some days I wake up to the melodies of smiling, chirping birds. They make me want to bound out of bed and sing the harmony parts, although K-Mac has a strict policy about singing in the bedroom while she is … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, funny, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments