Tag Archives: banjo

Do they think we are stupid?

They want you to believe that the world is round and not flat for one simple reason: The world actually is flat, as more and more people here at the rubber plantation are beginning to find out. Look,  when tens … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

Blotting out the sun

I know a guy named Al whose assigned duties include doing the dishes after dinner. (Stay with me, it gets better.) The other night, as usual, Al stacked plates in the dishwasher while ambidextrously whistling the Woody Woodpecker song. All … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

The Parsippany cutoff

One of the hazards of staffing a Frequently Asked Questions booth is that all too frequently the questions come with such lack of (i.e., im) becility that many of our volunteers suffer breakdowns, some of them automotive in nature, others … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Ask a bluesman

Q. I think I have the blues, but my doctor says it’s just irritable bowel syndrome. A. Is your doctor a bluesman? Q. He’s a gastroenterologist. A. You mean an ologist who enters your gastro works? Q. Not in the … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Questions that bother me so.*

So. Here’s a question. So, why do so many people, from age zero, up to but not including age geezer, begin every comment, every question, every answer to every question with the word so? So. See? So. No seeum. So. … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Irish in the powder room

At a party last week, I ducked into the powder room because I do unannounced freelance inspections on behalf of one of the bigger gunpowder companies. Fortunately, it was unoccupied at the time. It’s sooooo much easier that way. I … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Behind the mayonnaise

Memo to self: • Get a Nobel Peace Prize. Use it to attract banjo students. • Work up an act and go on the road. Leave act behind. • Become a genius. Tweet the word. Score a MacArthur genius grant. … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy | Tagged , , , , | 16 Comments