Tag Archives: wisdom

Larry’s Corolla

Spoiler alert: this article contains the answer to an unsolved mystery of science. Please avert your eyes while reading so you don’t give anything away to your Walter ego. Have you ever wondered why there is matter in the universe, … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Another man’s or

Our most frequently asked question of the universe-at-large (remembering to use our inside voice) is a simple one: Is there or isn’t there? Put more simply, in the universal language of the chainsaw-wielding prophet of the street — he of … Continue reading

Posted in Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The wise, hairy man

At weekly meetings of the Big Hairy Man’s Club, I am often asked why I willingly do the grocery shopping in my household instead of using that time on more hairy-manly pursuits like sleeping, eating, watching ESPN or taking the … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Haiku, yuku, wi all kuku

A poem dashed off in pajamas will not wait for a coat and tie. News breaks the promise that the beast of tomorrow won’t growl before dawn. Immortality begins with such simple words: ‘Once upon a time.’ The mind, not … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Balenciaga’s pizza

I have a question. Two actually. I’m allowed two because, in self-actualizing my full potential as master of my organism’s motive, I am saying what the hell, I get to ask two questions and you don’t. My first question, quite … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , | 3 Comments

The sky above, the zombies below

Last night our man dreamed he could fly. He’s walking down the street and just like in real life, it occurs to him he should act like a bee and buzz off. He clenches his fists and grits his teeth … Continue reading

Posted in News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , | 4 Comments

Up the Yingo

Studying proverbs of dead wise men won’t make you wise. Fact: Chinese proverb* writers never studied. They just said the first thing that came to mind. Wisers like Confucius or Sun Tzu or Laozi would look at a bleeding corpse … Continue reading

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments