Patrick A. McGuire, Bloggonian
For years I told jokes on street corners for tips, dreaming of one day owning a granite counter top. No luck, so I entered a monastery. I now do stand-up at daily prayer services. The monks' vow of silence means they can't laugh. I can't even laugh, although sometimes I sob quietly in the can. This blog is a cry for help. Send money or granite. I accept Pay Pal.
Tag Archives: parody
Rawt Ro
Owner: What do you want? Can’t you see I’m thinking? Ownee: Here I am, standing at attention, my head cocked at an adorable angle, awaiting your command. By the way, if you happen to have an old, unused treat hanging … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Dogs I Have Known, Mockery and derision, The human comedy
Tagged absurd, funny, hairbag, parody, rawt ro, satire, slobber, zany
2 Comments
First World Problem #782: Dave and the raisins
Q. Do you think Dave is the right person to be in charge of raisins? A. What? Who is Dave? Q. He’s the produce manager down at our supermarket. I thought you would have known that. A. Do you know … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, F.A.Q., News You Can Use (Sort of)
Tagged absurd, F.A.Q., funny, knock-knock, nutball, parody, sarcasm, satire, zany
3 Comments
Uh oh, fake Haiku
Saturday, a day for fixing, or feeling guilt for fixing nada. A day to repair the broken strings of harmo dang, I whacked my ny. Mow the lawn, rake leaves, Vacuum downstairs then the up. Say goodbye to nap. Out … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, The human comedy
Tagged absurd, Baloney, funny, kaopectate, M&Emziz, nada, parody, satire, zany
2 Comments
That’s a pretty big IF
If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, then you can keep your hat too. If you really love me, you’ll address me as your highness. If I was a baseball announcer and someone hit … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, The human comedy
Tagged absurd, baseball, funny, Gettysburg, humor, life, parody, satire, Shakespeare, walleye, zany
2 Comments
FAQ: Mental Health
Q. I have a friend who has been diagnosed with mental health. Is it contagious? A. You tell me. Recently, scientists put laboratory mice with mental health into a cage with mice who were crazy about bluegrass. After an hour, … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, F.A.Q., News You Can Use (Sort of)
Tagged absurd, F.A.Q., funny, knucklehead, mental health, parody, satire, zany
10 Comments
Frequently Asked Questions: The schneid
Editor’s note: In the previous post “Those who are on the schneid,” I grievously presumed the term “schneid” was commonly understood among those who commonly understand things. For those who commonly misunderstand the commonly understood I offer this F.A.Q. Memorize … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, F.A.Q., News You Can Use (Sort of)
Tagged absurd, funny, humor, parody, satire, schneid, zany
6 Comments
Those who are on the schneid
It has been my experience that there are two kinds of people in this world: • Those who use their turn signal and those who don’t have to because their mother said so. • Those who believe in God and … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy
Tagged absurd, buffalo, funny, humor, parody, satire, schneid, zany
17 Comments
a hint of light 