Note: If reading these haiku1 aloud, try ending each with the word “Grasshopper.” Or not. (Presence of actual grasshopper not necessary.)
Pilgrim’s Lack of Progress
Once there was no hate
only love to soothe the souls
of those who had one
Make fun of banjo
if you must, but remember:
when you pick, God grins
When refreshing the
empty peanut dish of life
why not try mixed nuts?
When you tick Him off
God writes down your name and draws
a line right through it
Subpoenaed by Congress?
Don’t worry, it’s just Congress;
sometimes they’re so cute
When you tell a lie
it’s like butt-dialing Satan
who just loves butt heads
He who loves the sound
of his own voice is a man
with hearing problems
Guy at Pearly Gates:
“I am who am, who am you?”
Don’t look good, do it?”
1 Say Hi Koo as in
“Hi Koo, Dude, howzit going?
You still with whozit?”
©Patrick A. McGuire and A Hint of Light 2013-2019, all rights reserved.
Last one’s not high koo (koo ka choob)!
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Noted, fixed, eat my shorts or bite my koo.
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