Category Archives: News You Can Use (Sort of)

Important information interpreted and prescribed

Physicists acting badwy

Posted on October 7, 2014 by PMcG

Dear you Yes, you. Snap out of it. Today begins a new feature for those, like you, who have neither an eighth-grade reading level nor the lip-moving speed required for eye-glazing biographies or autobiographies of the great men and women … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , | 7 Comments

The F-bomb work-around

Posted on September 30, 2014 by PMcG

Have you ever found yourself so angry you wanted to drop the F-bomb on someone? But you knew if you did, some little weasel would wag a finger at you and say “I’m telling.” You know it will eventually get … Continue reading →

Posted in Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

Apologies for Numbnuts

Posted on September 23, 2014 by PMcG

Do your friends, your relatives, the nephew you pay six figures to for keeping your enormous butt unbitten think you should apologize to an individual, a community, a nation or an entire planet for your stupid social and/or criminal transgression? … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Ten years in a fruit salad

Posted on September 18, 2014 by PMcG

Football players who get their bell rung have to pass a concussion test before they are allowed to play again. It’s a difficult test with both a verbal and math component. They also must write an essay on ‘Why in … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Let’s say this is funny

Posted on September 16, 2014 by PMcG

I hate it when a writer starts to explain something and says “Unless you’ve been living on Mars and don’t know that the Boer War is over…” Or “Unless you’ve been living on Mars and don’t know that Vincent Black … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Haiku, yuku, wi all kuku

Posted on September 9, 2014 by PMcG

A poem dashed off in pajamas will not wait for a coat and tie. News breaks the promise that the beast of tomorrow won’t growl before dawn. Immortality begins with such simple words: ‘Once upon a time.’ The mind, not … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Balenciaga’s pizza

Posted on September 5, 2014 by PMcG

I have a question. Two actually. I’m allowed two because, in self-actualizing my full potential as master of my organism’s motive, I am saying what the hell, I get to ask two questions and you don’t. My first question, quite … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , | 3 Comments