Patrick A. McGuire, Bloggonian
For years I told jokes on street corners for tips, dreaming of one day owning a granite counter top. No luck, so I entered a monastery. I now do stand-up at daily prayer services. The monks' vow of silence means they can't laugh. I can't even laugh, although sometimes I sob quietly in the can. This blog is a cry for help. Send money or granite. I accept Pay Pal.
Category Archives: The human comedy
Nuggets I picked up from my dog, No. 5
A Glowing Vat of Cheese Freed from his leash, Coffee J. Dogg seems a different animal. With the world now his fire hydrant he bops along with bushy tail motoring back and forth like a Grandfather clock on … Continue reading
Posted in Dogs I Have Known, The human comedy
Tagged bluegrass, humor, Katherine, Nuggets
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Nuggets I picked up from my dog, No. 4
Out In Real Life Bought Coffee J. Dogg one of those new-age leash thingies, the ones with the spring-loaded cord coiled inside an industrial strength plastic housing—sometimes known as a handle. That a simple dog’s leash could evolve into something … Continue reading
F.A.Q. The Dishwasher
Q. Are the dishes in the dishwasher clean or dirty? A. Dirty. I think. Q. Didn’t you run them last night? A. Me? Um I…don’t think so. Q. They look clean. A. Then they’re clean. Probably. Maybe. Q. Ooh, gross. … Continue reading
Nuggets I Picked up from my dog, No. 3
The Bus Stop Dog Before Coffee J. Dogg moved in, Katherine and I worried a bit about the friendliness of the neighborhood. There’s really nothing not to like about our little street, but after three years we didn’t really know … Continue reading
Fish story No. 2
The truth about fishing is this: no matter how much a fisher dude raves about the spiritual rejuvenation of being one with nature, in your typical 8-hour day of fishing on the lake that fisher dude doesn’t actually see that … Continue reading
Nuggets I picked up from my dog, No. 1
Where our souls meet The hound who walks me twice daily is a used dog. In fact, each of the previous dogs of my acquaintance over three-score years started out with someone else but by serendipity and a nose for … Continue reading
If it quacks like kryptonite…
Every now and then we’ll be out shopping for another 50 pound bag of fertilizer or attending a lecture on sustainable indifference to the neighbor’s wealth, when Katherine will say something like “Hold my bag for a second.” Yesterday it … Continue reading
a hint of light 