Tag Archives: humor

The Parsippany cutoff

Posted on March 30, 2016 by PMcG

One of the hazards of staffing a Frequently Asked Questions booth is that all too frequently the questions come with such lack of (i.e., im) becility that many of our volunteers suffer breakdowns, some of them automotive in nature, others … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

The diagnosis

Posted on February 2, 2016 by PMcG

Patient X (Not me): When I do the dishes, I tend to think out loud. Dr. Pepperoncini: Never talk to the dishes. Even if they start the conversation. Patient X: Did I say I talked to the dishes? Dr. Pepperoncini: … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of), Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments

Bear unzipped

Posted on January 26, 2016 by PMcG

Two guys are walking down a street in Iowa. To avoid lawsuits, we’ll call them the first guy and the second guy (not their real walking guy order). First guy says “Have you decided who you’re voting for?” “The Idiot,” … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

FAQ: What is going on?

Posted on January 20, 2016 by PMcG

Q. What is going on? A. Can you be more specific? Q. What is GOING ON? A. Ah. Good question. Now, do you mean what’s GOING ON here or there? Q. YES. A. Look, this is a licensed FAQ station … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, F.A.Q., Mockery and derision | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Venom and snot

Posted on January 5, 2016 by PMcG

That’s it. No more mister funny guy. No more silly stuff. No more laughs, no more being witty and wry. Not even pumpernickel. From now on I write nothing but sourdough, sauerbraten, sweet and sour sauce, hold the sweet (but … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

How to open an English muffin

Posted on December 24, 2015 by PMcG

Step 1. Get an English muffin. Now. Step 2. Stand near a window so you can see what you’re doing. Make sure you are decent. Step 3. Hold the muffin in one hand by its edges and gaze upon it … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, funny, News You Can Use (Sort of), The human comedy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

It’s nothing, really

Posted on December 9, 2015 by PMcG

Scientists have a fairly straight-forward rule. Before they are allowed to make a major announcement (“Hello? Is this thing on? Attention everyone: water is composed of two parts hydrogen, one part oxygen. That is all. Thank you.”) they have to … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of) | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments