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Patrick A. McGuire, Bloggonian
For years I told jokes on street corners for tips, dreaming of one day owning a granite counter top. No luck, so I entered a monastery. I now do stand-up at daily prayer services. The monks' vow of silence means they can't laugh. I can't even laugh, although sometimes I sob quietly in the can. This blog is a cry for help. Send money or granite. I accept Pay Pal.
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Feed Your Head
Tag Archives: zany
Full (as a tick) disclosure
You’re about to do something so bold, so socially weird that, should you be caught, your career — if you have one — is over. If you don’t have one, you will be issued a temporary, well-paying career with good … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of)
Tagged absurd, goofus interruptus, K-Mac, major loon, marmelade, peccadillo, Putin, satire, zany
4 Comments
Watch your head
Here’s what we know so far: Public confidence in the statement “That could never happen” has fallen in the polls, replaced by the fast-rising, seldom-believed promise “That will never happen again.” Mean people suck and will continue to suck for … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, funny, Mockery and derision, The human comedy
Tagged absurd, Alice, earbnb, fois gras, funny, satire, schneid, zany
5 Comments
No brainer
Haven’t we all laughed, maybe even slapped our thighs until it hurt so much we had to slap somebody else’s thighs, when somebody challenges another’s intelligence with “Where were you when they handed out the brains?” For those with a … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, News You Can Use (Sort of)
Tagged absurd, satire, slobbering, sudoku, underwear, zany
2 Comments
Quoting the Spearman
Q. Right. I’ll say something and you say the first thing that comes to mind. Then, I’ll say something else and you give me your first thought and so on and so forth, yada yada yada, yabba yabba do, boom … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision, The human comedy
Tagged absurd, henchman, meddlesome, satire, Spearman, wisdom, zany
4 Comments
The 7 People You Meet In the 10-Item Lane
1.The con man with a full cart of groceries. The cashier points to the 10-item sign and he whimpers “This is the express lane? Oh no. I didn’t know. Please. I have very painful bone spurs. And, I’m just a few … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, Mockery and derision
Tagged absurd, garlic, geeze bag, Heimlich, idiot, moldering, pretzel rod, satire, zany
5 Comments
The inner chatter
Q. I can’t fall asleep at night. What’s up with that? A. Maybe you’re overtired. Q. What the hell does that mean? A. Sounds like Mr. Grumpy is overtired. Q. How can I be overtired and not be able to … Continue reading
Posted in Absurd and/or zany, F.A.Q., News You Can Use (Sort of), Scribe v. Pharisees
Tagged absurd, anxiety, 睡觉的人, funny, Planet Nine, satire, Tu t'es moqué de moi, zany
6 Comments